[Ooookay, he's just not going to question where those came from. Instead he closes his mask back up and leans back, hands resting on the ground behind him.]
Uh, never. I don't think I could take over the world. You usually need to wear a suit for that.
[He eyes him suspiciously, but after a moment, he shrugs and shakes his hand. Firm handshake, definitely slightly practiced during the times he couldn't avoid the corporate world.]
And you're not gonna freak out about robots as a concept, right? 'Cause I have some stuff I gotta make.
Do I look like a bloke who goes back on my word?! If I say we're straight, then we're straight, mate. We're in this together. Ride, or die, or get blown up!
( sure, junkrat is a slippery, slimy turncoat when it suits him, but not when he'd never turn on one of his own. only suits and the people who want him dead get that sort of treatment.
as nice as the handshake is, chances are junkrat won't be able to feel much of it since his metal hand can only do so much. when he release wrench's grip, chances are that wrench's hand will be black in gunpowder and shadow. )
Hey, you can never be too careful. Let's save the blowing up for the competition, huh?
[He pulls his hand away and looks at it, turning it in various directions to see how the shadow's sticking to it. Neat. Eventually, he looks up.]
First thing I wanna do is put together a spiderbot. They're these little crawly dudes that you can drive around in small spaces in case you need to, y'know, get somewhere you can't really wiggle in yourself. It looks like physical hacks are gonna be especially important here since this place doesn't have the same interconnectivity as the last couple of places I've lived.
( the tilted head and put-off look wrench gets at 'no blowing ourselves up' says 'no promises,' but jaime perks right back up once wrench goes on to describe what he has in mind for his invention. by the time he's done explaining, junkrat is wriggling with excitement. )
We're gonna need cameras for that, yeah? 'Cuz how else are we gonna see where we're goin'? I know a place that's got LOTS a' cameras! Gonna need remote piloting... long distance range... radio waves? No, get caught up too easy... GPS positioning! With a honin' beacon, so it neva' gets lost! And we'll call her... Audrey...
( that's a proper name for a proper creation. )
And... a self-destruct button for when the job's all done..?
( pretty, pretty, pretty please, would you give this man a bomb? he's batting the few, sparse eyelashes he hasn't singed off. )
[He's nodding along with him as he talks, although when he mentions the self-destruct, he holds his hands up defensively, mask switching quickly between exclamation marks and swirly eyes.]
Woah, woah. You wanna be really careful with what you put self-destruct stuff into, dude. I don't have enough resources to destroy all of my machinery whenever I feel like it, you know? It'd be cool, but we should save that until we've made more.
[He can't believe he's discouraging blowing something up, but to blow stuff up, you need to have stuff to blow up in the first place.
Also he gets really attached to his robot kids, but shh.]
I like the name, though.
[It's always nice when someone actually understands the need to name things.]
( man, this fella's eyes keep switching around. seems like the thing an omnic would do... junkrat always abided by the 'never trust a bot,' rule, but this bot is cool and likes to make stuff! hoggy will understand! this is an exception! )
Fine. Fine! I'll make my own bot, name HER Audrey 2, and she's gonna be best pals with Audrey 1! And when push comes to shove, Audrey 2's gonna know what to do! KEWBLEWY!
( pause for maniacal laughter. )
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon! We gotta get on this before ya' go all bot-minded and lose who ya' are!
( also, the election. but losing his new friend to the omnics seems more important. )
I'm not gonna lose who I am, c'mon. If that happened, you would have heard about it more. Y'know, "be careful if you start turning into a robot" or something. It'll be fiiiiiine.
[He's pretty sure that could easily happen to an animal person or something too, anyway. Easily!]
But, yeah, sure, let's start this shit. The Audreys can go on playdates together. You got a good source for parts? I have some leads.
If a tree falls in the forest and no one's around to hear it, does anybody care?
[Cue winky face. Aaaand then... another blank stare.]
You don't think the cameras are the security, dude?
[A pause.]
I mean, I can definitely hack the cameras, but I'll probably have to get into their internal system first. Having everything all superconnected might suck for privacy, but man did it make getting into shit easier.
Way, way, waaaaayyy too many steps! Blow it up, steal the cameras, make the Audreys! Easy as one-two-th— oi, we ought'a grab money while we're in there, yeah? Be a shame to let it go to waste.
Not like it's gonna be worth a whole lot once I get to bein' mayor and the whole town switches ova' to BoomCoin, but 'til then. We could buy enough bombs to blow up the capital!
Dude! If you just go in tossing bombs everywhere, they're gonna find out, and they're gonna get you for it. If you turn off the cameras first, then they'll have less of a chance of finding you, and then you can set off the boom without them knowing, leaving you safe to boom again and again and again. C'mon man, I've been doing this shit for years. I know what I'm doing! I understand the temptation, booooy do I, but you gotta do it smart.
[He makes his hand into a fist and hits it on his other hand a few times.]
We get the cameras turned off, set up some kinda distraction so the security that's there focuses on that, and then we strike.
( junkrat makes a long, hard, strained 'hmmmmm' sound, like he's really, really stumped by this one. on one hand, there's explosions now. on the other, there's explosions later. and MORE explosions at that! this is the kid with the marshmallow test all over again. )
Alright, alright, alright! As my campaign managa', I'm lettin' you take the lead on this one. ( skeptically. hesitantly. it's not that junkrat feels like this bloke will walk him into the cops or something, but slow and steady just isn't the junker way.
as the overview of the plan, he gets to hopping around and raising one hand in the air as he's seen other kids do in those programmes about school. )
Me! ME! ME!! I'll be the distraction! Lemme do it! I get distracted all the time!!! I'm perfect for it!!
[If he already had a spiderbot, or even any kind of drone with good range and a decent battery life, he'd be able to cut out a lot of this extra stuff, but for now, they'll just have to do it this way.
Who knew all his work with DedSec would translate so well into the campaign manager position???]
I hack the shit, they try to investigate it, you make a bunch of noise, they try to investigate that, and then I just kinda swooce on in there and clean up. I'll bring a sledgehammer.
[Oh well, it's still a fun job he just kind of landed with, and if this dude can actually get elected, it'll make this place all the better until he can get himself back to his correct position in spacetime.]
So what's the bank? I'll look into it, see if I can dig up any floorplans. Once I hack the cameras I can probably get a good idea of it, but the more intel we have beforehand the faster it'll go.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Uh, never. I don't think I could take over the world. You usually need to wear a suit for that.
no subject
An' how does that make ya' feel??
no subject
It... doesn't??
no subject
( got 'em!!!! )
no subject
no subject
( he throws his imaginary clipboard over his shoulder and offers his hand. )
Welcome aboard, My Good Bot!
no subject
And you're not gonna freak out about robots as a concept, right? 'Cause I have some stuff I gotta make.
no subject
( sure, junkrat is a slippery, slimy turncoat when it suits him, but not when he'd never turn on one of his own. only suits and the people who want him dead get that sort of treatment.
as nice as the handshake is, chances are junkrat won't be able to feel much of it since his metal hand can only do so much. when he release wrench's grip, chances are that wrench's hand will be black in gunpowder and shadow. )
What's on your agenda? I'll lend ya' a hand!
no subject
[He pulls his hand away and looks at it, turning it in various directions to see how the shadow's sticking to it. Neat. Eventually, he looks up.]
First thing I wanna do is put together a spiderbot. They're these little crawly dudes that you can drive around in small spaces in case you need to, y'know, get somewhere you can't really wiggle in yourself. It looks like physical hacks are gonna be especially important here since this place doesn't have the same interconnectivity as the last couple of places I've lived.
no subject
We're gonna need cameras for that, yeah? 'Cuz how else are we gonna see where we're goin'? I know a place that's got LOTS a' cameras! Gonna need remote piloting... long distance range... radio waves? No, get caught up too easy... GPS positioning! With a honin' beacon, so it neva' gets lost! And we'll call her... Audrey...
( that's a proper name for a proper creation. )
And... a self-destruct button for when the job's all done..?
( pretty, pretty, pretty please, would you give this man a bomb? he's batting the few, sparse eyelashes he hasn't singed off. )
no subject
Woah, woah. You wanna be really careful with what you put self-destruct stuff into, dude. I don't have enough resources to destroy all of my machinery whenever I feel like it, you know? It'd be cool, but we should save that until we've made more.
[He can't believe he's discouraging blowing something up, but to blow stuff up, you need to have stuff to blow up in the first place.
Also he gets really attached to his robot kids, but shh.]
I like the name, though.
[It's always nice when someone actually understands the need to name things.]
no subject
Fine. Fine! I'll make my own bot, name HER Audrey 2, and she's gonna be best pals with Audrey 1! And when push comes to shove, Audrey 2's gonna know what to do! KEWBLEWY!
( pause for maniacal laughter. )
C'mon, c'mon, c'mon! We gotta get on this before ya' go all bot-minded and lose who ya' are!
( also, the election. but losing his new friend to the omnics seems more important. )
no subject
I'm not gonna lose who I am, c'mon. If that happened, you would have heard about it more. Y'know, "be careful if you start turning into a robot" or something. It'll be fiiiiiine.
[He's pretty sure that could easily happen to an animal person or something too, anyway. Easily!]
But, yeah, sure, let's start this shit. The Audreys can go on playdates together. You got a good source for parts? I have some leads.
no subject
Sure, sure. But if ya' start talkin' in beep-boop riddles, I call dibs on punchin' yer ticket outta here!
( please consent to letting him murder you, wrench. )
I got leads, alright. Know a bank with tons a' cameras and barely no security! They're beggin' us to steamroll 'em!
no subject
[Cue winky face. Aaaand then... another blank stare.]
You don't think the cameras are the security, dude?
[A pause.]
I mean, I can definitely hack the cameras, but I'll probably have to get into their internal system first. Having everything all superconnected might suck for privacy, but man did it make getting into shit easier.
no subject
( answer: no. )
Way, way, waaaaayyy too many steps! Blow it up, steal the cameras, make the Audreys! Easy as one-two-th— oi, we ought'a grab money while we're in there, yeah? Be a shame to let it go to waste.
Not like it's gonna be worth a whole lot once I get to bein' mayor and the whole town switches ova' to BoomCoin, but 'til then. We could buy enough bombs to blow up the capital!
no subject
[He makes his hand into a fist and hits it on his other hand a few times.]
We get the cameras turned off, set up some kinda distraction so the security that's there focuses on that, and then we strike.
no subject
Alright, alright, alright! As my campaign managa', I'm lettin' you take the lead on this one. ( skeptically. hesitantly. it's not that junkrat feels like this bloke will walk him into the cops or something, but slow and steady just isn't the junker way.
as the overview of the plan, he gets to hopping around and raising one hand in the air as he's seen other kids do in those programmes about school. )
Me! ME! ME!! I'll be the distraction! Lemme do it! I get distracted all the time!!! I'm perfect for it!!
no subject
[If he already had a spiderbot, or even any kind of drone with good range and a decent battery life, he'd be able to cut out a lot of this extra stuff, but for now, they'll just have to do it this way.
Who knew all his work with DedSec would translate so well into the campaign manager position???]
I hack the shit, they try to investigate it, you make a bunch of noise, they try to investigate that, and then I just kinda swooce on in there and clean up. I'll bring a sledgehammer.
no subject
( now he's good and excited! )
ONWARD, MINION! TO GLORY, FREEDOM, AN' ANARCHY!
no subject
[Oh well, it's still a fun job he just kind of landed with, and if this dude can actually get elected, it'll make this place all the better until he can get himself back to his correct position in spacetime.]
So what's the bank? I'll look into it, see if I can dig up any floorplans. Once I hack the cameras I can probably get a good idea of it, but the more intel we have beforehand the faster it'll go.